March 05, 2005

watch me make this peanut butter cap'n crunch disappear

You can stop speed-dialing the suicide prevention hotlines and writing maudlin poetry bemoaning my absence 'cause I'm baaaaaaaaaAAAAAAck, ladies and germs. Miss me?

I launched a site yesterday so now I have some free time once again. How did I celebrate post-launch? I sat on my couch with a Yuengling while watching Real Time with Bill Maher and eating Peanut Butter Cap'n Crunch right out of the box. Don't ever say I don't know how to have a good time.

As I was snarfing, a singular peanut-buttery ball went astray. I felt around my sides, patted down my front, took a peek down my shirt but alas, no errant cereal to be found. I thought maybe I had just imagined it during my exhausted-yet-euphoric binge. Shortly after, I got ready for bed and at long last, slept off the relaunch.

It was a restful slumber mostly devoid of dreams... save for one brief one where I walked into an office of some sort to discover that wee fella from The Station Agent being interviewed for a job. Anyone want to take a stab at analyzing that? Oh and during the week, there was a dream about THE EX. Except, she looked like Salma Hayek and during our discussion, she threw her arms around my neck and straddled me while whispering incoherently in my ear. Umm... thoughts?

So I just climbed out of bed a wee while ago and made my way into the can for my first-of-the day tinkle. I dropped my drawstring drawers and what fell out but the missing Peanut Butter Cap'n Crunch -- totally intact. It was like a magic trick unfolded right there in my bathroom. I reached behind my ear to see if there was a quarter or something, but alas, no dice.